Back to Black

Yesterday I had an old friend randomly text me this article.    At that moment, I needed to read it too.  Isn't it funny how some people, your true friends-the one's you have an undeniable connection with- always seem to know when you need them? I am lucky to have a few soul sisters in this life.

Truth is, I've been struggling lately.  I know that I have absolutely no reason to feel the way I do.  I have a husband who is way to good for me, that I really don't deserve, who gives me anything I could ever want, we have a comfortable home and I have two healthy kids.  On top of that I'm allowed to stay at home with my kids.  I get to be with them and mold them into the people they will become, all by myself.  I think that's important, too.  I don't want to send them to daycare or have a nanny come and do my job for me.

However, everyday I feel like I am losing more and more of myself.  I feel like I am getting lost in the mundane, that I am wasting my life, my chances of being someone, anyone, by way of laundry and suppers and carpooling and cleaning and etc etc, when in reality I don't think I have ever known who exactly I am supposed to be.  Everyone I know is now excelling in their careers and chosen life paths and I feel like I am doing the same thing, walking down the same  old dusty path, playing wife and mom.

It's true that change is essential for your mental health.  
So why is it so hard to change your path sometimes?

TGI Humpday!

31

I have to say thank you to everyone who sent me facebook messages, texts, emails, snapchats, presents, called, etc. etc. for my birthday this year.  

It means the world to have so many lovely people who took the time out of their day to wish me well.  

Thank you from the bottom of my heart!

We did a low key birthday this year.  

(We are supposed to close on our house Tuesday, so when the Mister asked what I wanted this year, I could only tell him that I wanted a house.)

I really wanted to go to Wildfire for lunch because their chopped salad is AMAZING and they have a really extensive Gluten-free menu.

However, once we got there, we found out they are renovating, and therefore closed during lunch hours until October 1.  Under normal circumstances, this wouldn't be to much of a problem, unless, of course, you have Celiac Disease.

Then it's a HUGE problem.

(If you are ever in Chicago and you have any kind of gluten sensitivities, all Lettuce Entertain You restaurants have great gluten free menus!)

After walking around and grumbling a bit, the Mister said we were going to Joe's.

Not a good start for low key, I know.  

But it was fabulous.

And who am I to argue?

 AND I got free desert.  

(My ass thanks you, nice people at Joe's.)

 We spent the rest of our afternoon checking out the Rebuilding Exchange, 

(Not as cool as habitat for humanities in St. Louis,  but still pretty cool)

and thumbing through a few used book and record stores

I was able to find some steals on a few record's.

I love it when that happens.

Then we spent the rest of the evening at the ball park.

Does your Mister keep score while at the game?

Mine does. 

And let me tell you......It's the  Cutest.  Thing.  Ever.

And although the Cubbies didn't pull off a win, it was a fabulous way to ring in year #31 in this life. 

Thank you again for all the birthday love!  Next time I post, I will no longer be a city dweller...but a crazy forest living suburbanite. 

holyshitholyshitholyshit

Have a great week, everyone!